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Hi all,
Kindly provide feedback on this portrait.
There are few things that aren't looking all the nice.
1) The pillar texture is not right. How to improve?
2) Hair once again has not come out right. How to improve?
Any other thing that is not looking natural and needs to be worked on, please let me know.
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Permalink Reply by Prosenjit Roy on February 14, 2012 at 12:12pm Its hard to offer critique on such a wonderful drawing, but since you insist I'll try - not that I think I'm qualified to do so. Just consider this an alternate point of view.
I think, in our search for details we sometimes tend to overlook (ever so slightly in this case) the whole. The picture - the girl and the pillar looks a bit askew, tilted upwards to the right, which may contribute to your sense of unease and dissatisfaction. If you draw lines across the eyes, you'll see how far down the outer corner of the right eye is positioned compared to that in the left. Now, this wouldn't be a factor if her head itself was tilted. But the tilt in the eyes do not corroborate with the over-all tilt of the head, which is little to none. To confirm, compare that same tilt with a line passing along the bottom of her nose - there the tilt is minimal. Since the nose is a fixed structure, compared to say the lower jaw, it is a good reference to compare horizontals with.
The same is true for the pillar too @ how far the upper border of the box, which houses the curved figurine is tilted up. Now there's nothing wrong with this, its the sculptor's prerogative if he/she so wished to have a skewed box to contain the figure - but, taken as a whole with the tilt in the eyes, its contributing to the skewed effect.
Secondly, the shadow/light scheme - as we can see from that beautiful oblique shadow down her right cheek, there is a strong light coming from the top-left (our left). There were probably large open windows in the room, casting those square highlights on her iris. There's also a second light, almost equally bright, coming from her left (corroborate with the second squar-ish highlight). Irrespective of what was in the reference, I'd have given preference to the light on the left (our left) and dimmed the left part of her face a notch. I'd have also shrunken the area of the 'eye-lights' (highlights in the eyes) just a tad - but again that is a personal observation. I think these would've imparted a greater sense of harmony to the whole drawing.
There are smaller areas which could've gained from a little tweaking, like the anatomy of her ear - the Anti-helix (the curved structure just inside of the outer, curved ring or Helix) is not adequately defined IMHO. Again, this is irrespective of how it looks in the reference.
The rim of her left nostril, because of the location of the shadow underneath, seems to be detached/floating from the face at its outer end. I'd have extended the shadow just a little outwards to include that end of the rim.
I don't think anything needs be done with the hair, its just fine as it is and would probably benefit from not drawing too much attention to itself. The viewer's eyes are now wonderfully focused on her smile, we do not want other areas of detail to compete with this focus.
So that's my two cents really, please consider it at your own discretion :)
Permalink Reply by Rashmi CN on February 17, 2012 at 2:40pm Wow, thanks so much for taking time to look through my drawing and providing your thoughts.
The reference photo was taken in a GK Vale studio and hence multiple light source.
Regarding the tilt, her face had a slight tilt and I tried to capture it,but I messed it up a little. I guess my initial outline was the problem.
Also I have always had problems with hair and ear - as I put in very less time to work on it. Have been trying to gather more patience in that area, but once again have neglected it. Will consciously work on this aspect.
I have modified the pillar a lil bit before I "fixed" it, so I think it is slightly better in the final version.
Thank you so much. I will spend more time on my initial lines and will try to give importance to all the part in my drawing without neglecting any.
thanks once again
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